Monday, July 21, 2014

Destination Weddings Tips: 5 tips for blending families with kids at second weddings.

5 tips for blending families with kids at second weddings.

It's not uncommon for the bride and groom to have children from previous marriages. No shocker considering the divorce rates around the world. There's no rule about how to involve your children from previous marriages in the wedding -- the only guideline should be that you don't force them to do something that makes them feel uncomfortable or disloyal to their other birth parent. Here are some ideas of how you can involve them in the process so that they feel like they're part of the new family the marriage is creating.

1) Ask them to help with planning if they are old enough.

2) Let them invite their friends.
Not only does this take pressure off the parents to keep everybody entertained, but it gives the kids a support system if he or she needs somebody to lean on. 

3) Involve them in the actual ceremony.
Ask them to act as bridesmaids or groomsmen, which is a hugehonor. A son can walk his mom down the aisle or act as the Best Man if he's old enough. Artistic children can help with decor. Readings -- especially about family -- can be poignant coming from one or more of the bride and groom's children. But just be careful to give each and every child a special role so that nobody feels left out.

4) Create an event within the actual ceremony that demonstrates the new bond being created.
The most popular way to do it is with a sand blending ceremony, but there are other methods of sharing the actual vows with your children. For example when new step-parents make vows to their new step-children promising to love them and be there for them forever, no matter what might happen. Or when the children make vows to each other to become brothers and sisters of the heart, regardless of blood.

5) Give children an opportunity to have a real role at the reception.
With smaller children, having a special dance where the new parents dance with their new children can be precious. A giant "trash the dress" experience where the whole group jumps in the ocean or swimming pool together can be a hilarious way to bond as well, and makes for fabulous pictures.

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